Notes to self

yes another post! hahaha

1) Stop waiting for forever  

2) Change the world, even if just for your own liking  

3) Keep laughing at your own jokes  

4) Be strong, don't let anyone knock you on your ass so hard that you can't get up

5) Stay curious about everything

6)

Stop trying to prove yourself to feel cool

7)

Your nostalgia may seem like a burden but at least it makes even the most mediocre memories seem vivid and exciting

8)

Let the right people in, there are few who sure as hell deserve it and sometimes its actually worth it

9)

Keep listening to crappy music while watching shitty movies if it makes you smile

10)

Cut yourself some slack (shit happens) worrying about your mishaps just gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.

ballad for the chaotic

Sometimes a little voice inside my head tells me that I won't finish college. No, it is not because I have low self confidence (well I know I don't but thats another story) I think its because I'm afraid of a number of things accompanying a degree. 

1) I am really afraid that I will kinda slide by in school like I always have. I have no idea how exactly to work up to my potential. I see peers doing extra curriculars and taking advantage of different things such as befriending professors 0r putting their hearts into papers. Maybe I don't push myself towards goals because it seems as though they would be set in stone after I accomplish them. 

2)

I suppose I do not have low self confidence I have low self efficacy. Although I fortunately posses a thirst to learn as much as I can while I am alive, knowledge in one area of interest is difficult. I aspire to be a well rounded individual, so I guess I can be mistaken as indecisive or passionless.

3) Im only twenty. You may be able to plan your life year to year, I'm more concerned with figuring out who I am. On my quest of personal discovery maybe I will find consistency.

4) I want my life to be filled with rich experiences. I do not want a 9-5 desk job.... My restless self (and ass) cannot take it. 

5) im just being dumb now ....bed time

75 Questions to ask yourself

75 questions to ask yourself!

1) Why not me?
My first response after reading the first question of seventy five is, is this a question often asked by most to make it to the number one spot? I feel like in the course of my twenty years I have asked myself, " Why not me", when complaring the way my life has paned out in comparison to those why I surround myself with. I seem to feel a million different ways every day but right now at 7:10 pm (10:10 EST) is if anything happened the way I planed it to I would be wondering why not me for something else. I may feel different in an hour or two hours or even tomorrow morning right now its not why not me its just this is me.